To be satisfied with a little is difficult. To be satisfied with a lot is impossible. — Brother Bill’s Rule #2
You learn certain truisms when you grow up in a big midwestern family with eight brothers and two sisters. That’s a lot of noise, a lot of competition, and not a whole lot of bathroom time.
As the second oldest, I somehow got the idea early on that I should pass along a little wisdom to the younger crew, whether they wanted it or not.
Over the years, I started collecting sayings, observations, and bits of humor. Some came from coaches, some from newspapers, and a lot from just sitting around listening to people talk. I don’t claim to have invented most of these. My real talent has been recognizing a good line when I hear one, and then hanging onto it.
Eventually, these became known as “Brother Bill’s Rules.” For years, I tucked them into Christmas cards. These days, with the internet doing most of the heavy lifting, it’s easier to share them far and wide. And maybe that’s appropriate. A good rule of life shouldn’t be hoarded.
Some of these are serious. Some are not. A few contradict each other. Most are the products of someone else’s cleverness. Sorry about that. That’s life, I guess.
Life Lessons
Here are a few of my favorites:
Take the time to listen to your grandparents ramble about their youthful years. One day, you’ll wish you could hear those stories just one more time.
To be satisfied with a little is difficult. To be satisfied with a lot is impossible.
Live a good, honorable life. Then when you’re older and think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time. That one grows more meaningful with each passing year.
Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt, but it’s the only way to live life completely.
Grass stains are good. They mean you were outside, you were active, especially here in Wyoming. And you probably weren’t staring at a screen.
I heard a comedian say that he knows a vegetarian who says he doesn’t love animals, he just hates plants. That one always gives me pause.
Remember that “no” is an answer when you ask for something through prayer. It may not be the one you wanted, but it’s still an answer.
Approach love and cooking equally: do both with reckless abandon. Life’s too short for bland food or half-hearted affection.
Embrace change, but don’t ditch your values. Even here in the Cowboy State, the world will move around you fast enough without you losing your footing.
Another old joke is that: “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, I eat.” That one explains a lot about my expanded girth.
He Who Has The Most Toys
He who dies with the most toys . . . still dies. Not much more needs to be said about that.
Don’t spend all you have, believe all you hear, or sleep all you want. Moderation never goes out of style. That sounds like Cowboy Ethics.
Talk slowly but think quickly. That’s a skill I’m still working on.
This one might have been on a bumper sticker: “Speak softly but wear a loud shirt.” A little personality never hurt anyone.
This one may have come from my brilliant daughter Shelli Johnson: “Goals can be deceptive. The unaimed arrow rarely misses. Sometimes overthinking is the enemy of getting anything done.”
The internet contributed this one: “Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.” There’s something to be said for staying grounded.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire. I’ll just leave that right there.
When I’m not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded. Happens more often than I’d like to admit.
Boycott shampoo! Demand the real poo! That one came from a particularly long road trip.
Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my hard disk? Technology has only made that one more confusing.
This one might have come from Buffalo columnist Jim Hicks: “What happens if you get scared half to death twice?” I’ve wondered that more than once.
I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out. There’s a balance there somewhere.
Montrose columnist Steve Woody might have contributed this one: “I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.” Not all solutions are improvements.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name? Fair question.
If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you. Some lessons only need to be learned once.
And, Now The Conclusion
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. I’ve reached a few of those over the years.
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it. Ain’t that the truth.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. Especially these days with social media. Columnist Dave Simpson lives this one with all the snipes made against him on Facebook because he favors common-sense Trump ideas.
No one is listening until you make a mistake. Then suddenly, everybody’s paying attention.
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view. That one has been proven time and time again.
Looking back, these rules say as much about the journey as they do about the destination. Life isn’t a straight line. It’s a series of moments, some funny, some painful, some unforgettable. If you’re lucky, you pick up a little wisdom along the way.
And if you’re really lucky, you get to pass it along.
That’s what Brother Bill’s Rules have always been about.
Bill can be reached at bill@cowboystatedaily.com
