To hear our Wishy-Washy, Middle of the Road, Republican Lite friends tell it, the primary in August is the most important election in Wyoming history.
So important, in fact, that they are encouraging Democrats – if they can find one – to cross over and vote Republican Lite to throw out vile Freedom Caucus people (like us), and salt the earth so nobody like us ever gets elected again.
(Didn't work in the Hageman vs. Cheney beatdown, but they're giving it the old college try once again.)
The Wishy Washy Republicans firmly believe they must stop torch-bearing, hair-on-fire, lynch mob Freedom Caucus people (like us) from screwing up Wyoming with our crazy, Flat Earth notions.
You know, Flat Earth notions like that property tax cut we all got last go 'round, and will get again this year.
Flat Earth notions like requiring people who vote here to be actual citizens of the United States.
Goofy, nut-ball lunacy like not issuing driver's licenses to people who are in the United States illegally, many of whom don't speak the language and can't tell the difference between a “Road Closed” highway sign and the Chugwater exit. From the wheel of their overloaded 18-wheeler.
And not letting truckers who can't read our signs drive 400 miles across Wyoming on I-80 or I-25.
Flat-Earth craziness like cutting the governor's budget this year by $53 million, when the Republican Lite clique in the Wyoming Senate wanted to increase the governor's proposal by $53 million.
This craziness must STOP, according to our Wishy-Washy Republican Lite friends.
Freedom Caucusers (like us) oppose putting sex how-to manuals, illustrated, where our youngsters can be exposed to them in children's sections of school and public libraries. Think that and the Wishy-Washies will say you want to “ban books.”
Clay Travis – one of the guys who inherited the time slot from Rush Limbaugh on talk radio – has an interesting take on that book ban lie: “Conservatives don't 'ban' books, by the way,” Travis writes. “They argue about what books are age appropriate to have in libraries. An R-rated movie isn't 'banned.' It's just restricted by age. If local news can't show all the pages of a book, call me crazy, but it shouldn't be in an elementary school library.”
Bingo!
Our Republican Lite friends have undergone an identity crisis in recent years. Last election they called themselves “Frontier Republicans,” but that apparently didn't feed the bulldog. This year, they seem to be calling themselves “Traditional Republicans,” which sounds nice, but reminds me of that old criticism of the GOP: “It's a Grand Old Party. And you aren't invited.”
I don't have particularly fond memories of the Old Buffaloes who used to run the joint. I recall that under their leadership, it took two years to pass a bill banning boys from playing girls' sports. And when it finally passed, the governor let it become law without his signature, and called it “Draconian.”
Draconian? I was an OK swimmer in high school, and I could have beaten any one of the swimmers on the girls' team, probably by a large margin. Where's the fairness in that? Where are the old women's rights activists who used to have so much to say?
I remember bills, under the Old Guard, that easily passed one house of the Legislature, only to die a quiet death in some drawer in the other house. There was still some of that going on in the Wyoming Senate this past budget session, where the Republican Lite folks still hold a lot of sway.
Even after the Freedom Caucus took over leadership of the House last year, University of Wyoming officials said they could continue to fund DEI activities from other sources, rather than abide by legislative cuts. And then the governor vetoed the cuts anyway. (Probably figured they were Draconian.)
So, I don't get all warm and fuzzy thinking about the former legislative leadership.
I'll finish with this.
In Wisconsin, they used to prohibit margarine manufacturers from dying their product yellow, so you could tell real butter (yellow) from the ersatz stuff (kind of a sickly white).
More than ever this election season, Wyoming voters need to look close to tell the Ersatz Republicans from the Real Deal.
Check their voting records before you vote.
Dave Simpson can be contacted at DaveSimpson145@hotmail.com
