Man tries to pet moose and gets repeatedly stomped. Check.
Man gets too close to bison and gets chased off. Check.
Person leaves bear attractant in car and car gets demolished. Check.
The trifecta makes it official: Spring is in full bloom in the Rocky Mountain West.
Sadly, there’s no video of the latest indicator of a forthcoming glorious tourism season but there are photos — which are glorious — and serve as a good reminder that bears are bears and people will never listen.
Bears can open doors. Especially unlocked doors. Especially when there are bear attractants inside.
The Colorado Parks and Wildlife Service on Monday sent out that reminder after showing what appears to be left of an SUV.
Leather seats ripped open exposing gobs of orange foam. Plastic casing spilling out of the door. Rubber strips dangling. Car trashed.
Sunday’s incident pales to last year’s fabulous story where a bear was attracted by the scent of beer and not only trashed the car but drank almost a full case before exiting.
This year, the culprit was just lip gloss but it was enough to ruin the vehicle.
“There was no food/trash left inside here, but there was lip gloss,” a spokesperson for the wildlife service said. “It’s scent was strong enough to entice the bear to check it out.”
“Keep unwanted guests out of your cars by locking the doors and removing anything with a scent,” they said.
For what it’s worth: Keep car doors and windows closed and locked if you park outside. Make sure there’s nothing with an odor in your vehicle, including candy, gum, air fresheners, trash, lotions or lip balms.
Also, don’t make pants out of bacon and then wear them into the wilderness.
