Columnist Sally Ann Shurmur writes, “The inquiries started coming in before the San Jose State debacle was even over.”
A Cowboy from a long time ago wanted to know the last time the Pokes finished the season with just one win.
Before I could get that research finished, someone else wanted to know what Wyoming’s longest string of consecutive bowl appearances is.
It ain’t pretty in Laradise, where all the good things we had planned have gone the way of errant passes, late play calls and a defense that looks okay at times and awful at others.
First, the inquiries.
In 113 seasons of Wyoming football, there have been nine one-win seasons. And in two seasons, 1923 and 1913, Wyoming did not win a game.
The most recent one-win disaster was 2000. Blessedly, it had been 30 years before that, the 1-9 year in 1970 that was Lloyd Eaton’s last.
John Corbett survived three one-win seasons in 1916, 1921 and 1922.
Obviously, his basement trollers didn’t have social media to spread the venom.
As for the bowl question, that is much fresher in our minds.
With Craig Bohl at the helm we went Bohlin’ in 2019 before COVID and 2021, 2022 and 2023 after.
We may not like it, but we are familiar with elusive.
Who remembers Cabbage Patch dolls?
At Christmas 1984, long before Facebook, shoppers caused riots looking for the cloth-bodied, plastic faced cherubs who came named, with a birth certificate and so honest to God smelled like baby powder.
With a 10-month-old boy preparing for his first Christmas, we didn’t think much of it.
Then Fritz the Dad went to the LA Rams staff Christmas party, and owner Georgia Frontiere had a Cabbage Patch doll waiting for every player and staff member.
So Mickey Marvin in his turquoise overalls and white plastic baby shoes came to live in Casper.
Joe absolutely loved that doll and we were the envy of many a parent who had searched in vain for one for their house.
We survived the toilet paper insanity of 2020, but thanks to Facebook, a new craze is now in full swing.
McCormick, makers of all things spice, has come out with a line of “Finishing Sugar,” just in time for holiday baking.
It’s just white sugar, people.
With a little bit of flavored extract added in, it becomes “Gingerbread,” “Candy Cane,” “White Frosting, “Hot Cocoa,” “English Toffee,” and “Salted Caramel.”
The selling price at the blue big box is $3.47 each.
But it’s as hard to find as a Wyoming win or a Cabbage Patch doll in 1984.
The driver was sent the other day, with clear pictures as reference. He even asked a manager, so as not to be in more trouble when he returned empty-handed.
It’s not that I need it. Hell, a couple of weeks ago I didn’t know it existed.
I am perfectly capable of adding a teaspoon of extract to a cup of sugar and stirring it.
But the bottles are pretty and I want them, damn it. All six.
Just like I want a Wyoming win or five.
Just like so many mama’s wanted Cabbage Patch dolls in 1984.
What’s more elusive? A Pokes win or six gold-lidded bottles from the spice aisle?
We’ll know soon.
Sally Ann Shurmur can be reached at: SallyAnnShurmur@gmail.com
