‘Twas the night before Christmas, ‘round the ol’ campfire
Coyotes were howlin’ out past the picket wire
Stockings were hung on the chuckwagon box
Cowboys wore boots without any socks
The cattle were lowing, the horses were fed
And saddlesore cowboys were ready for bed
Sugarplum visions danced under each hat
Sweet dreams of women and houses of cat
Thoughts of cheap whiskey and nights on the town
Made the trail crew want to finally lie down
All of a sudden, from down in the draw
A familiar voice growled, “Merry Christmas. Yee Haw!”
A pot-bellied figure all dressed up in red
With a beard white as snow and white hair on his head
Strode up to the campfire with a load on his back
And plopped on the ground a big gunnysack
“It’s Satan!” said Rimrock, with a look of pure fear
“Naw, it’s Cookie,” said Gus. “Happens ever’ year.”
The fat crimson elf with the twinkly eyes
Smiled at the cowhands and hollered, “Surprise!”
“I been makin’ a list, an’ checkin’ it twice
Some of ya’s naughty, and some of ya’s nice”
He twirled on his boot heel and shook his white beard
“It’s Christmas Eve, an’ I’m finally here.”
“I bring coal an’ onions to bad li’l boys
But for good bronc peelers, I bring a sackload o’ toys.”
The cowboys all looked deep within their own souls
Toys are shore dandy, but you can always use coal
An’ onions would be a nice break from beans
Besides, we got next year to start livin’ clean
“But ya been workin’ hard takin’ care o’ the herd
So my sack ain’t full o’ discoragin’ words”
“The Big Boss loves ya, ya love him right back
So gather ‘round buckaroos, let’s open this sack.”
This news filled the yuletide cowboys with joy
They all gathered ‘round like good lil’l boys
Spurs an’ ammo an’ bright neckerchiefs
Piggin’ strings, an’ sharp pocketknives
Warm union suits, an’ oodles of snoose
Mistletoe belt buckles polished for use
Santa regarded the tableau with pleasure
Waddies were tickled with each Christmas treasure
The Big Empty echoed with all o’ their laughter
An’ Heaven was happy right up to the rafters
So Cookie or Santa snuck away from the camp
And the cowboys playing in the campfire light
The last word they heard from the jolly ol’ scamp
Was “Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night”
Rod Miller can be reached at: RodsMillerWyo@yahoo.com