Dave Simpson: And Another Year Goes Belly Up

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By Dave Simpson, Columnist

Let’s tie up some loose ends as another pretty questionable year lumbers to a close:

– To what country do Americans go to seek asylum?

At what country can we cross a river or land on a beach, put one foot on dry land, claim we are afraid to live in the United States anymore, and win the right to seek asylum and live there forever?

It’s a valid question, as the Democratic and Republican parties are once again spending us, our children, and our grand children into oblivion with their relentless, obscene, snout-in-the-trough overspending. Where do we go for asylum when these lunatics (see last week’s $1.7 trillion pork-laden spending spree, in the face of $31 trillion in accumulated debt) finally bring down the house of cards and destroy this great nation with their profligacy?

Ever wonder what a congressman’s checkbook looks like? Do they get away with this tomfoolery on a personal basis?

Now that it’s clear that neither party stands for sane spending, where do we go, and is there a political party there with the sense to pour stuff out of a boot?

Problem is, there’s no other country like that. No other country naive enough to throw its borders open to anyone, anywhere, who is afraid of something in their own country, and invites one and all to (as they say on “The Price is Right”)  “come on down.” And stay there – free bus rides to wherever you want to go – while a crazy, unlikely review process takes years years to complete.

I visited a dozen countries back in my salad days, and every one of them – including the United States – took their borders deadly seriously. (In 1971, it took me five hours to clear customs in New York.) Not so anymore here, as the United States has become the patsy of the planet.

No asylum for us, friends.

– When I read that the “omnibus bill” included millions for border security in countries like Egypt, Tunisia and Jordan, but none for our own southern border, there was the distinct feeling that our noses were being rubbed in something. They do whatever they want, whenever they want. And they keep getting re-elected.

Most of these politicians are people you wouldn’t want sitting around your kitchen table. And if they did pay a visit, you’d count the silverware after they left.

Oh, there are some good ones – Rand Paul, Mike Lee, Ron Johnson and John Kennedy come to mind. I don’t trust Lindsey Graham anymore, and Ted Cruz talks a good game, but that’s about it. Kevin McCarthy looks like a big talker, but maybe he’ll work out. I was relieved that Cynthia Lummis voted against the vile omnibus, but I noticed that John Barrasso didn’t vote, which may suggest he’s trying to keep one leg in the Mitch McConnell canoe. I hope not.

The real question: When 18 Senate Republicans vote for the vile omnibus, what good are the Republicans? Why vote for them? They’re not on our side either. And here in Wyoming, when Republicans in the House can’t pass a bill keeping boys from playing girls’ sports, what good are they?

– Ever had a job where you could fail to prepare a budget on time for 26 years, spend far more than you make in revenues to the tune of trillions in debt, and then pass a 4,155 page bill that nobody has time to read on Christmas Eve to avoid shutting down the federal government?

Ever had a job like that?

Me either.

– Turns out you’re better off driving your car over your wife’s foot than being pro-life and having two ex-girlfriends who claim you paid for abortions if you want be an Honorable U.S. Senator. But not much better off. Georgia re-elected the foot masher.

–  Lastly, I see the nuts at Stanford University have compiled a list of words we shouldn’t use anymore, and they’ve included “grandfather,” because some rules get “grandfathered.” (“Grandmother” is still OK.)

Well, this grandpa says horse feathers. I’d go to the mat on this one folks.

But, who in their right mind listens to the nuts at Stanford anymore?

Never mind.

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