It probably is expected that people of a certain age might spend more of their time looking backward rather than looking ahead.
Let’s face it, as a youngster or even a middle-aged person, you spend most of your time thinking about the future and working toward making a better future.
Alas, when you have completed more than 75 trips around the sun, you pretty much are stuck in the present. And if you are lucky, you can look back to the past on a life that is full of wonderful moments and rewarding memories.
How To Define Happiness?
Pat Henderson was a bright young guy in Sheridan who was full of great ideas. He sent me one about a column idea about four years ago.
“I think an article where people share what makes them happy and how to live in the moment are appealing to your readers,” he said. “I have learned a great deal from sage folks (especially older persons). But I can always use more help.
Pat said his favorite quote on this subject is from Ronald Reagan: ‘Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, leave the rest to God.’ “How beautiful. I seem to get mushier as I age,” Henderson concluded.
Yeah, I am a lot mushier, too.
And I get mushy when I re-read those comments because my friend Pat died of cancer in 2023 at the young age of 62. He was a great friend and always had good ideas for me.
I think even before he discovered he had cancer, Pat would dwell on happiness. Happiness is always a big topic. And one of the great questions to ask of people is “when were you the happiest?”
My kids are surprised when I tell them that their mother and I were probably our happiest between the ages of 65 and 75. We were about as happy then as we had ever been in our lives. I know that sounds crazy as creaky bones, sore backs, reduced physical prowess occur, but it really was the truth.
Nancy and I loved to travel and being together in an exotic place ranks very high. Times in Paris, Hong Kong, Maui, and Yellowstone probably top our “happy list.”
My wife was diagnosed with MS 40 years ago. As a result, we decided to travel the world at a younger age and pay for it with credit cards. Those were happy times. Then we planned to work way beyond retirement age to pay off all that debt. It worked.
Old Age Can Be A Wonderful Time
Living in an older age can be a wonderful time, especially if all members of your family are okay and you are in reasonably good health.
In truth, I can get very sappy in my old age.
The demeanor I like to wear is that of the all-knowing journalist or the experienced hard-nosed businessman.
The reality? As I have gotten older, it is amazing how sappy I have become. Not so hard-nosed at all.
My eyes start to water during some of the scenes in the movie “Field of Dreams,” even after seeing it a half dozen times. The scene where his dad comes onto the field, well, gulp . . .
Classic movies like “Gandhi,” “Doctor Zhivago,” and “Lawrence of Arabia” all have scenes can make me choke up. “Titanic” is in a class of its own when it comes to bringing out sappiness.
There is a definite connection between being sappy and being happy, besides the two words rhyming.
So many times, when you get emotional it is over your family. Most of our 13 grandkids call us Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop. They are aged 10 to 33. I love it when they call me that name. It is a term of endearment. (“Terms of Endearment,” itself, was one of the most sappy movies ever made.)
Our long period of time on earth I call it the Arc of Life is shaped like a rainbow. You start out as a young person full of hope and wonder with a life full of goals as you march off into the unknown called the future.
At my age, we are now at the other end. We really do know what we grew up to be. At this stage, you look back and marvel at all the different experiences you had. Family events usually make up the most memorable – and the times when you were the happiest.
And What About You?
My next column will be from friends and readers responding to this with stories of when they were happiest.
I am looking forward to hearing from readers as they tell me what constituted the happiest times of their lives. I would exclude weddings, births of children, etc. Focus on specific times in your lives, please.
Please email to bill@cowboystatedaily.com. Looking forward to hearing from folks.
